talk to non-xtian friends

had quite a good chat with sond today.. it would've been longer if not for ifg meeting...

if anything, for the first time, i admitted that i had problems opening up to my ex-classmates. to be honest, i don't even know when i started, but, i think sometime after jc, i notice that whenever there were class gatherings and etc, i'm the quietest. which is kinda weird, because, i'm usually one of the noisiest in class. i remember in sec4, miss sie had to separate liling and i, because we talked too much during class... i wish i have that problem now.

i'm not the quietest, because i've all of a sudden gone dumb. it's just that i find it hard to talk. i'm more than happy listening to my friends talk and share about their ongoings in life.. sometimes, it seems that i'm a little boring in comparison to them.

a lot of things has been going on in my life. i don't think i'm boring (because, i know i'm not..heh). i can actually talk non-stop... in cg or sharing setting, i can yak and give many prayer requests. but with my other friends, i just strike dumb. sometimes, it's because i think they wouldn't understand.. often, it's fear. a fear that they would think i'm talking about fluffy stuff when i talk about what God has been doing in my life. that i'm a loony to believe in this relgion-crutch thing. but, i guess... this also shows how much confidence i have in my God.

sorry God:(