kairos vs kairos??

today after frontiers, i had 2.. no 3 choices:

1. previous cell
2. food trail around eastern part of singapore with the youth leaders
3. go home. period.

and since the thai Meet team was going for my previous cg, i thought it would be good to go back, because i could go back and see them all,while blending into the background (cos Meet team was there). of course the reason i wanted to go back was because i missed them too.. it's been almost a year since i moved to wefc.

but then,because the wefc youth leaders had that food trail, and yes, it was food. but no, i actually had no mood for any greasy food... and also, i thought it's good that i should go because it's the church that i am in now.

it's always good and comforting to be with people you are comfortable with. you can just be yourself, sit back and watch the people you love chatter, and once in a while, laugh with them.

yet, the nagging thought of responsibility and of course, calling (which was what today's frontiers' session was all about) kept being pushed back and forth, back and forth in my mind.

in the end, i decided i was/still am actually, really tired. plus if i did go for cell, i would be late, and i didn't want to make a grand entrance(which defeated the whole idea of blending into the background). and, i had not much energy left to go to some ulu part of singapore in the east (easties.. don't protest.. i actually like east coast park. yes. ).

i went home.

but at causeway point, while checking out the bakeries and prodding their breads to see if they were soft and eat-able, i suddenly remembered that my previous cell was called kairos.

and that brought back a flood of memories...i remembered that after i had prayed about whether i should stay on in qbc or move with the rest of the family to wefc, of which God indicated very clearly in several instances, that i should move on to wefc.. i talked to jonathan, who was at that time, both a vcfer and a youth leader in wefc, and he said he was going for kairos. and i asked him, "kairos?! what's kairos". to which he replied that it was the cg formed for the youth leaders in wefc.

and i remembered how that sent shivers down my spine... to see how God was taking me out from one kairos to another. it has always been clear that God wants me to serve in the youth ministry.

i look at the bunch of youths at qbc and remember how i was worried that there wouldn't be people to help these kids grow in God.. and obviously, i was so wrong. as soon as God called me to go to wefc, the burden that He had placed in Serene's heart for youths finally moved her to want to serve in ywav. and it was amazing how she was telling me that she was praying about serving in ywav in 2005, and i had not told her i was going to change church. in fact, Serene is doing a really good job with those bunch of youths..and, i must say, a much better job than i did.

i really affirm "uncle" Seng Eng. a calling is so important, because there would be times when i get discouraged and start wondering what on earth i am here for. but then, when i remember it's because God called me, i know i have to be committed to the end, to do what He has planned.

Isaiah 52:11, 12
"Put Babylon behind you, with everything it represents, for it is unclean to you.
You will not leave in a hurry, running for your lives.
For the Lord will go ahead of you,and the God of Isreal will protect you from behind."

God has taken care of my past.
He has also taken care of my future.