Friday, August 12, 2005

ain't perfect

it's official, i ain't a freshie anymore.

a freshie I am no more
of thicker tomes I must pore
Wisdom come my way, I implore.

yesterday was arts vcf welcome tea. there were many freshies.. a lot. to the point that, i'm a lil worried for cg, cos i realised that there will be many needs to be met. have to make sure the freshies fit in, the seniors still get their input, and my co-cgls that we are still alive.. haha. yeah. maybe "worried" ain't the word. i'm definitely challenged. and i've grown to realise that i'm a perfectionist. especially when i take charge. it took my social work tutorial to clash with my e-lang core modules, which spelled a total disrutption of my PERFECT timetable. i freaked, i tell you. plus, i was darn pissed that the lecturer didn't bother putting up her module on ivle any sooner than 2 days before the lecture, kindly informing us of the difference in the two separate sw modules. i was like, wert?! (then again, it's my fault, i should have checked the sw website.)

so, it led me to the choice of 1. find another module to replace the dropped sw one( rebidding at round 3C??if i can even find any modules left-.-) or 2. drop sw, and simply stick to 5 mods this sem. argh. after i calmed down, i realised that it could be God's way of saying, "stick to 5 modules. you can't handle 6 this sem." so, i'm back to 5 modules. yes. sigh. i guess it's a good thing after all, because, i've grown to realise that meeting people, especially new people, saps my energy. i was so exhausted after yesterday's welcome tea. i've met way too many people eversince i've moved church, and especially so for vcf in the past 2 months. [disclaimer: but, that doesn't mean i don't enjoy meeting people.]

sunday's Festival of Praise, was real good. the worship was simply there to exalt God, and nothing else. it's so often that we forget that we all exist to magnify God's glory. and that we are all here by God's grace.. haha. i think from now on, people should just call me by my chinese name 'Rong En', cos it means, by the grace and for the glory of God. furthermore, when Ps Edmond Chan prayed at FOP, he reminded everyone that we need to be joyful, that the "joy of the Lord is our strength". how true. i need to find joy in meeting people, in serving God, in studying, at home, etc...

a friend pointed out that i strive to be perfect in things. yesterday, while i was recharging my batteries before welcome tea, i did my qt and prayed. and these 3 lines surfaced in my head:

perfection unattainable
leave everything in the hands of
the God who is able.

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