Monday, January 31, 2005

le temps

i've been feeling happy recently.. joyful, if u think that's a better word cos' "happy" is just a state of mind. but, "joyful" is a state of being.. Lol.. i should go lecture philo ^ ^

don't even know why i'm feelin so good. it's good to feel good. i hope i stay up here for a while. it sux to feel bad. besides, it's been a long long time since i last felt so good.. life seems almost perfect.. which is dangerous cos' it may take God out of the picture.. must work extra hard to not neglect Him when life is smooth.

yeah. u know, i really feel good..

anyway, just a funny thought, i can't help but feel as if the need to find a bf is right in my face. nono.. is "need" the right word?? maybe "want" would be better. want to find a bf. it's tough u know, when most of your friends around you are either officially attached or half attached, havin an exclusive relationship with some guy. maybe it's bcos i've been 20 for half a month, and the biological clock is goin 'tick-tock tick-tock'. my mom says it's the AGE to start dating.. argh. it's not the pressure.. it's just in-your-face. and i find it very irritating..make that extremely irritating. everytime i meet up with my sec & jc friends.. the MAJOR topic is always about guys, bf. whenever i meet up with long-time-no-see friends, i must say i'm a bore.. cos' i have no 'interesting' tales to tell about any encounter with any guys.. (unless u count that super cute&blur psych guy i met last fri.. haha.. he's really REALLY cute ^ ^ he makes me actually consider taking psych as my major..tempting.. but, nah) it doesn't help that my mother, when talking to her friends, KEEPS mentioning her intention to kick my out of the house in 3 years time cos' i'l be "married by then". right. *fumes* obviously she is joking.. like she jokes even with the fishmonger about marrying me off to the richest guy in the market. "market", as in the palce where you go buy food.. not the general term "market". i seriously fear when the parents talk to other parents with guys of marriageable age and JOKE about MY marriage?! it is seriously scary..*freaks*

ugh. anyway, just an afterthought. i've been worried about what i'm goin to major in nus.. and i've finally decided to major in European studies, with a minor in English studies. this combination actually allows me to read History, Lit & 3 loves(: i'm actually excited just thinking about it.. don't u think it's cool to say that you major in European studies?? it's just so avant garde.

anyway, better go study for tmr's french test. Bonsoir ^ ^

Sunday, January 30, 2005

addicted to pineapple tarts

i'm seriously addicted to Glory pineapple tarts..they are so yummy, the pastry is not the excessive flaky kind, there's plenty of crunch from the pineapple.. ooh.. i would like to think that they are not that fattening bcos the pastry is not buttery.. haha. as if. i'm trying to kid myself.. unfortunately, abel just decided to try them and ate the remainin 3... -.- he should have eaten earlier, then i would not have devoured so many!?

anyway, fat season is coming in.. ooh cny.. don't u just love it?? pineapple tarts, bak gua, kueh bang kit, grandma's cookin, my mom's cookin.. cookies of all kind, chock full of butter.. calorie laden.. haha. n that goondu abel is readin over my shoulder now as i type and has decided to try the above mentioned..


Sunday, January 23, 2005


took this off from timfoo's blog.. i just thought that it was rather apt for what i've been mulling over recently:

Thankfully, it was also then that God made me realise that i was not alone! He was with me=) Was very comforted by that. And it was then that i felt realli close to God. Soon, my confidence picked up and i got to know more people there=)

What i thought was gonna be a horrible phase, turned out more than juz fine! Now as I look back, i think God is reminding me that regardless of how many people are around you, or how many people are not around you, you can still be complete in Him. He even tells you how. Thank you Jesus, Praise God!=)

something to remind myself of now, just the thing to remember in the next few months to come. it is true.. when one starts to focus on the wrong things, ie. the focus is shifted from God, life will feel unbalanced. eventhough last year nus was such an alienating world for me, i did feel really close to God. but these few days, i feel like i'm all over the place. drifting further. and i recognize that i'm clinging on to the wrong things. it's tough to not cling. it's not absolutely wrong. it's not even wrong. but it becomes wrong when the focus is no longer on God..

it's so difficult to live a life where i am complete only in God. it's so easy to forget when one is surrounded with people/friends. it's a lesson God has been trying to teach me since sec school.. it seems that every year, i've one best friend flying off to study in some country. i thought i learnt my lesson well, when liz left and i've learnt to cope.. apparently not. this time, it's my turn to uproot. i've got to live such that regardless of the people around me, i'm complete only in God. sigh. such a difficult lesson to learn. but it's a must to.

makes me think of the song: it's all about You, Jesus. And all this is for You, for Your glory and Your grace. it's not about me, as if You should do things my way. You alone are God and I surrender, to Your ways.

Sunday, January 16, 2005

this one is just plain weird.. it seems like me.. but not really.. it's for relationships.. n i took it without ever havin a bf.. LOL ^ ^

You are a RSIT--Reserved Sentimental Intellectual Taker. This makes you a Archetypal Older Child.

You are a hard nut to crack. You have a wicked sense of humor. Despite your reserved nature, you are more comfortable (and successful) in the meeting and courting mode than you are in a long term relationship. You feel misunderstood, and usually you are.

When you're in a good mood, you're funny, fascinating and a sexy firecracker, but when you're in a bad mood you are moody, broody and impatient. In courtship mode, you don't have to let anyone see your moody side. If you had your way, even in a long term relationship you would have enough time apart to deal with your bad moods yourself; unfortunately, it rarely works that way.

You stifle *a lot* of anger and frustration -- from all areas of your life -- so when it comes out it comes out nasty. More than any other type, your conflicts tend to turn on one tiny thing -- the dishes, the laundry -- that's really a scapegoat for your larger dissatisfactions with your relationship. You're baffled that your partner just can't do the dishes -- your partner is baffled that it's such a big deal. The only way around it is to let the dishes go entirely and try to get at the real root of what's bothering you.

I'm making you sound like a bear, but the fact is that you're so warm and charming most of the time that it effectively offsets the times you're unhappy.

You will make a weirdly good parent.

don't u just like the last part?? now, that's wat i call WEIRD.
now, this IS hilarious... wah lao.. they told me to g n lie more...

Your score as a human being is 80.35.

You are close to ideal. So close, and yet so far. Amusing, really, to watch someone squirm so close to the vaunted ranks of perfection and still remain so very, very ordinary. It is all one can do to keep one's ingratiating smile from polluting one's perfect face.

Actually, one recommends you take the quiz again and lie a little.

piece of crap.. don't they realise that NICE people actually exist???is that so HARD to believe??
You are a SECL--Sober Emotional Constructive Leader. This makes you a Politician.

You cut deals, you change minds, you make things happen. You would prefer to be liked than respected, but generally people react to you with both. You are very sensitive to criticism, since your entire business is making people happy.

At times your commitment to the happiness of other people can cut into the happiness of you and your loved ones. This is very demanding on those close to you, who may feel neglected. Slowly, you will learn to set your own agenda--including time to yourself.

You are gregarious, friendly, charming and charismatic. You like animals, sports, and beautiful cars. You wear understated gold jewelry and have secret bad habits, like chewing your fingers and fidgeting.

You are very difficult to dislike.

did this on my first try.. n this was wat i got.. i sounds lil like me.. when i disagreed n did more.. it started to not sound like me.. so, bottom line.. just tkae the first score.

go to:

Friday, January 14, 2005

me, sarah, sond & liz! my sec sch best friends(: Posted by Hello

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

2005 resolution

I am seriously STUFFED. Went to sond's house today w liz& sarah... apparently, to celebrate my birthday. I love my friends.heh. we talked a lot about relationships(or rathertheir relationships w their bf/guy friends). Looking at them, it makes me even more certain to stay off any guy for the next one&half years.. it's so time consuming+emotionally drainin.. I can't even handle academic stuff n church n friends n family well enough. Oh well.. so much for wanting to get married by 25 and then have kids before 30.. haha. It's hilarious, I know. I seriously don't think that's quite feasible(:

Oh well. It's almost an ides into January.. and I think I've finally figured what my resolutions for this year are...
1. spend more time with the have dinner with them once a week/fornight.
2. Befriend tutorial mates. And hopefully share the gospel with them.
3. exercise.Exercise.EXERCISE!!
4. work diligently in school.
5. Trust in God more. And to not doubt His plans for me.

So, there. My resolutions for 2005. I don't care about all those bs that resolutions don't work. Well, if you don't try, how would you know??

Anyway, the first day of school, yesterday, was good.. I was really tired by the end of it. But, thankfully I had a free day today to rest.. I better get used to this routine. So far, school seems good. I feel more confident. And it helps when you do know more people. What's most important is that I know that for this year, I should try to share the gospel with my friends.. which means, I have to go find friends first. When you kinda know what God's plan for you is, there's this indescribable assurance in life.

Okay. I better go off.. there's class tmr morn@8am. But, I'm still full from the lagsana. And I think I'm constipated again. I always am when school term kicks in..ugh.. how's that for my stomach??

Saturday, January 08, 2005

got this off one of the vcf online albums. thought it was really apt esp after the ywav camp+ the recent tsunami. Posted by Hello

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

new year

oh well..guess wat.
it's the new year.. 2005!!
*sheepish grin* okok.. fine.. no lame jokes..
i'm kinda in a hyper mood now..
sometimes i wonder.. the older you get, the more the brain degenerates rite?? esp with the amount of lame jokes i spew nowadays..

jokes aside.

it's 2005. and i'l be 20 in some days..(*ah-hem*i'm not as bhb as some ppl, who put countdown the days for you to remind you.. plus, blatantly tell you wat they want for their annoying*rolls eyes*) heh. anyway, my teenage years are going gone.. i'm left with a few days now..heh.. it reminds me of luyang.. she said she had a very low-key n hush hush 20th that time, which was like 2 years back, i didn't quite get her.. but, now, i understand. i'm getting old.. and it's not easy comin to terms with it. ok, so maybe i'm exaggerating the whole issue.

going to hit 20..
it's when more responsibilites are dished out.. your licence to act ridiculous, is almost gone. ppl, esp the older n wiser adults would give that wat-on-earth-are-u-doing??? look. yeah.. i get the in church sometimes.. esp, when i talk too loudly and laugh too loudly.. thankfully.. i'm responsible most of the other times.. if not.. there goes my rep..

this year.. is going to be a new year.. a challenging year. the school year will be interesting, i'm quite excited abt sem2.i'll know virtually no one for all my modules.again. but this sem is different from last sem. i'm confident that God has let me go to nus for a purpose.. and i pray that He will really use me this sem.i hope that i will have confidence in school, in meeting new people and making new friends. confidence. what a way to start the year. let's hope i have this same confidence for moving to a new church(:

Saturday, January 01, 2005


Uncle Lawrence lead this at watchnight service, yesterday night. as we sang this song, it struck me with the fact that God is KING over the flood, over the recent tsunami disaster, eventhough it may seem unfair of God to have allowed it to happen.


Hide me now
Under your wings
Cover me
within your mighty hand

When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with you above the storm
Father you are king over the flood
I will be still and know you are God

Find rest my soul
In Christ alone
Know his power
In quietness and trust