Thursday, April 06, 2006


recently, i've been learning that accountability is really important.

your friend and buddy is not just there to pray for you.. often, when we use the word "accountable", what does it actually mean?
in the past few weeks, i've grown to realise the significance behind that overused word.

accountablility is:

1. being open to your leaders.

to be honest, i used to think that my church and school life were very separate. been struggling a lot in both areas recently, and especially in the area of church. and i thought i was alone in this struggle.. but after countless of complaining sessions and after M pointed out that leaders should have a degree of understanding of whatever each of us go through, i did a burden verbaige on F two sundays ago... which subsequently led to another verbaige on S the following saturday. and i must say, it was really a form of release for me. i was really surprised by how both F& S were so understanding, they let me talk and they offered good advice and most importantly, they prayed for me.

2. telling your friend to keep watch for you.

sometimes,handphones can really be, i checked my hp after ltp, and read an sms which made me really disappointed with the person... and esp after how i almost ate another person up with my irritation last monday... when i came home, i msn-ed Ms and told her that i had to tell her something, and i really wanted her to pray for me. and it was really necessary, because, i was obviously annoyed and disappointed.. but,if i had let that seed of annoyance and disappointment grow. oh boy. i don't even want to know what the outcome is. after i told her, she helped to clarify some stuff.. and both of us agreed that we should just leave it into the hands of God. by telling Ms, i was getting her to ensure that i wouldn't bitch about that person and have unreasonable thoughts. and more importantly, pray with me for it. ( so, Ms,when you read this.. remember:pray!!)

[ok, here we stop for a lil commercial break. because, as i was typing, this humongous bug flew into my room.. humongous because it landed on my back. without looking, i swiped it away with my hand. it flew to the wall with a thud. and i turned to look, only to see a COCKCROACH!!! of course it felt huge, it was a freaking cockcroach. i stared at it, half in amazement because a cockcroach just flew into my room?! the other half of me was utterly disgusted, because it was a cockcroach, worse, one that could fly. as i watched that thing trot along my wall, a growing fear welled up inside of me. next thing i knew, it flew, and i gave a short yelp and grabbed my towel to shield me. and of course, curiosity got the better of me and i had to peer over that clean towel just in time, to have that thing fly towards me. i quickly crouched, and allowed it to fly to my curtain. but alas! it was not going to fly out. and,i was seriously freaked out. it was 1.35am.. i decided that i couldn't and didn't have the guts to fight it alone, so, i quickly ran out and woke my dad up. and he came. and to cut an already long story shorter, he eventually killed that awful cockcroach by squeezing it in his hands=X (think twice before you shake his hands next time!!). but, ya, he washed his hands with a lot of soap;) now,my room reeks of insecticide...and i think i should sleep in the guest room tonight..]

anyway, what was my point in recounting the midnight tale of the flying cockcroach? well, yeah, it would serve as a really funny story.. but it also shows the importance of accountability..because when you need help, HOLLER. you can never fight a cockcroach alone=D

3. getting your friend to pray with and for you.
as much as i have a tendency to talk a lot.. i actually keep a lot of things to myself.. sometimes i think i keep too many things inside of me, which isn't really wrong. it's just that, there are certain things that need accountability. that if i'm seeking God for an answer and also because of the nature of the issue, it's better to do it with a friend. ok, er, i recognise that i can't exactly state the nature of it, because it's private. but yeah... anyway, after keeping a particular issue to myself for more than 6 months, and after getting a cue today, after knowing that a friend has been keeping himself accountable to his cgl, I decided i better let W know too.. because, i think the burden was getting a lil too heavy for one person to bear. what's amazing is that, after i told her what it was, she sensed that i wasn't ready to give her a full story, so she told me to wait til i was ready. and i really thank God for that. because, i had been holding back for a long time from telling anyone as i was worried that the matter might be blown out of proportion.. and i guess that's why i keep stuff to myself and try to settle it with God.

anyway, there are quite a few other instances that God has been using friends to bless me. if i thank you individually, you know:)

so, if you've been encountering an issue, and you know that it's not best to hold it inside you, let it out, and get a friend to pray for you, ok? which actually, is the most important thing. accountability is firstly letting someone know. but more importantly, being prayed for and with:)

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